Category Grief & Loss

Unplanned Community at Planned Parenthood

Yesterday I was asked how I can support Planned Parenthood as clergy. I don’t speak for all clergy, but here’s my story: After I learned of my clergy spouse’s affairs, I called my OBGYN and requested an appointment ASAP. Since we had been seeing her for infertility, she enthusiastically returned my call thinking I wanted […]

And Some of the Words are Theirs

Today would have been my seventh wedding anniversary. Instead, it’s the second anniversary marking that our lives no longer one. In many ways, I’ve already given today its due during the eighteen days I was recently in Montreat. He and I worked together on Montreat Summer Staff as college students. He proposed at a dear […]

This Is Our Story

We’re a mess, but we’ll be alright, in this glorious story you write. I spent the last two weeks keynoting Montreat Youth Conferences with my colleague and friend James Goodlet. While we did not meet until seminary, James and I grew up attending youth conferences with our home churches. We are products of Montreat. It’s […]

Birthday Candles

My mom died about thirty minutes after midnight on a Saturday night. Since Monday of that week she told everyone she was going to die on Sunday, and sure enough she kept her word with that just as she always did. Earlier that Saturday night, while I was washing her sparkly silver hair, I mentioned […]

Freedom Train

I haven’t blogged in about a year because, honestly, my life has been an unraveling hot mess. Last January, I chose the word “freedom” as my word for 2014. At the time, I thought this would be the year I learned what it was like to live into the freedom of cancer no longer being […]

Blue Christmas

This time last December 13, I crafted two prayers for Church Health Reader’s winter edition featuring Blue Christmas and Longest Night Services while I sat in a surgical waiting room. My mom had a liter of fluid in her right lung, so a surgical oncologist inserted a chest tube to remove the fluid. This is a […]

Choreographing a Crisis

As a chaplain and pastor, I am inevitably with folks during periods of crisis, trauma, and chaos.  One of my mantras that I repeat time and time again to families during such times is, “Your crisis. Your call. Your choreography.” I say this because often folks try to please everyone else in their extended family, […]